There are days when classroom management stops being about “strategies” and becomes a relationship problem. A student walks in guarded, the class feels it, and you can sense the power struggle before anyone speaks. You can still hold boundaries, but when the relationship is fractured, consequences alone often stop working the way you want them to.
That’s why I keep coming back to a simple practice called 2x10. In the clip below, I describe it as one of the best things I’ve done as an educator: two minutes a day with one student for ten consecutive school days. In practice, I often stretch it to 5x10, because two minutes can feel too quick, but the principle is the same: protected, consistent connection that is not disguised as a behaviour conversation.
What matters is what it creates. Knowing students on an individual level helps build calm and trust, and it honors dignity and identity in your classroom. It gives your expectations somewhere solid to stand.
What 2x10 is really doing
Most students who are stuck in conflict are not listening for your logic first. They’re scanning for whether you’re safe. 2x10 quietly changes that scan, not through a speech, but through repetition.
When you show up consistently without trying to fix, correct, or extract a confession, you build a different kind of credibility. Over time, you’re not just building rapport, you’re building the conditions where learning and repair become possible again.
How to use it without turning it into a “check-in chat”
Start by choosing one student. Not the easiest student. Choose the one where the relationship feels brittle, tense, or stuck.
Then choose a predictable moment that is low-stakes and private: arrival, the first few minutes of independent work, dismissal, or a transition where you can be beside them without making it a public performance. Protect the time and return to it daily for ten consecutive school days.
The key is keeping the moment agenda-free. If you use those minutes to circle back to yesterday, to coach behaviour, or to “teach a lesson,” the student feels the hook. 2x10 only works when the student experiences you as steady.
What to say in those minutes
Keep it ordinary. You can ask about what they’re into right now, what they’re listening to, what they’re good at outside of school, or what part of the day feels easiest. You can also just notice something neutral and let them lead.
Low-pressure prompts (any age):
“What’s something you’re into right now?”
“What’s the best part of your day so far?”
“What music are you listening to lately?”
“If you could change one thing about today, what would it be?”
“Can you show me something you’re proud of?”
For younger students:
“Show me your favorite part of your drawing.”
“What game are you playing lately?”
“What do you want to be the class expert in?”
For older students:
“What’s been feeling annoying about school lately?”
“What’s something you wish teachers understood?”
“What’s one class that feels easiest right now, and why?”
If the student gives you nothing, you still show up.You can narrate something neutral:
“I’m going to keep checking in for a bit. No pressure to talk.”
If they give you nothing, you don’t punish the silence. You simply return tomorrow. Consistency is the message.
What you might notice first
People often expect a sudden breakthrough, and that’s not what usually happens. The early shifts are small: the temperature drops faster after conflict, repair is less dramatic, and the student is a little more present in the room. Those are not minor wins. Those are signs the relationship can hold stress without breaking.
Where 2x10 fits in the bigger work
I don’t teach relationship moves in isolation. My focus is helping schools move from compliance-driven discipline systems to structured, rights-informed learning communities grounded in equity and student voice.
The point is not less structure. In a rights-informed classroom, structure becomes legitimate because it’s anchored in safety, dignity, and voice, not compliance for its own sake.
That’s also why, when educators integrate the Web of Rights over time, many notice a shift where conversations about behaviour become conversations about dignity, and conflict becomes an opportunity for reflection rather than punishment alone. 2x10 supports that shift because it strengthens the relational conditions that make the framework usable in real moments.
The mistakes that quietly ruin it
Most 2x10 failures are not because teachers do it “wrong.” They fail because adults can’t resist making it transactional.
If the two minutes turns into a behaviour talk, it stops being 2x10.
If you only do it when the student is “good,” you teach conditional connection.If you make it public, you risk shame.
If you expect warmth on day one, you’ll quit before the consistency lands.
This practice is not about speed. It is about credibility.
If you want to learn more, here are two good next steps
If you’re new to this work, start with the Web of Rights Starter Guide. It’s designed as an introduction and offers the foundational mindset and language needed to begin.
If you want a more structured pathway from introduction to sustained practice, the Web of Rights Implementation Planner guides a structured four-week rollout and includes teacher scripts, discussion prompts, printable student reflections, activity templates, and planning space. It’s designed to support movement from compliance-focused management toward a structured, rights-informed learning community grounded in dignity and shared responsibility.
“Who died and made us the god of curriculum, the god of their future?” Think about that. Students don’t want to be forced into school. They want to stay home. And yet, every day, we make them come. So they walk in already thinking, “Oh man, why do I gotta go?”
Then we hand them a plate and say, “Here, eat this sandwich. Read this book. Do what I said you should know.”
No. Just no. That’s the disadvantage we face. Students are not empty vessels. They are humans with curiosity, creativity, and ideas that matter. Forcing them into a rigid program (one size fits all) shuts all of that down. And it doesn’t just feel wrong-it is wrong.
If we are serious about building structured, rights informed learning communities, we have to start by questioning the posture of control that defines so many classrooms.
Education Is Like Running a Restaurant
When you run a restaurant, you don’t guess what people want. You figure out the community, the location, the menu. You open your doors, and you start serving. Then you listen. You watch. You adjust.
“The sandwich was good, but it was missing something.”
Maybe they don’t know exactly what it is. That’s when the chefs step in. A pinch of cinnamon here, a little less salt there. Serve it back. Not quite right? Adjust again. Until finally-oh my God, that’s perfect. That’s exactly what I wanted.
This is teaching. We are the chefs of education. We have a giant toolbox: our expertise, intellect, and experience. Students bring us their questions, curiosity, and ideas. It’s our job to curate their learning experience around their needs and their voice.
Listen, Adapt, Serve
We know some things students need: literacy, numeracy, essential skills. But beyond that? Stop shutting out their creativity. Stop assuming we know better than they do.
Ask:
What do students need?
What do they want to learn?
How can we help them explore and grow on their terms?
When we listen, observe, and adapt, we move away from compliance and toward engagement. We stop being the “god of curriculum” and start being the guide, the chef, the partner.
Make Education Nourishing
Education shouldn’t feel like a sandwich shoved down their throat. It should feel like nourishment - thoughtful, personal, and crafted to help each student thrive.
The more we treat students as co-creators of their learning, the more alive our classrooms become. Curiosity replaces resistance. Creativity replaces boredom. Engagement replaces compliance.
And that’s how we move from forcing students to school to inviting them to learn.
If This Resonated
If you found yourself nodding while reading this, you may be ready to go deeper.
If you are an educator interested in moving from compliance driven management to structured, rights informed practice, the Web of Rights Starter Guide offers a practical starting point
If you are a parent trying to understand how student voice functions inside schools, Helping Your Child Be Heard at School provides clarity on advocacy rooted in dignity and collaboration
Honouring student voice in schools must be a foundational aspect of institutionalized education. Society relies on culture and language to function - communication is the thread that weaves together the diverse cultures of society into a cohesive whole.
Schools exist to prepare children for life in society and should reflect this in microcosm. In this microcosm, students need opportunities to communicate effectively with people who hold different opinions. Through these experiences, they learn how to navigate differences, find common ground, and contribute positively to the “society” of their school community.
Without honouring student voice, schools risk serving only a single purpose: silencing the next generation to preserve societal stagnation for those already in positions of comfort and power.
What the Literature Says
Philosophers and educational theorists provide guidance on why student voice is essential:
John Dewey, in Pedagogic Creed, emphasizes that members of society must first understand how society functions before they can positively influence it.
Bobbitt’s theory of curriculum highlights the importance of culture in society, noting that culture allows individuals to form groups with shared values while still existing within a diverse social ecosystem.
Paulo Freire underscores the significance of the voices of the oppressed, showing how communication with those in positions of power is necessary for meaningful change.
Together, these ideas remind us that society is built from individuals who communicate their identities, form cultural groups, and interact with other groups. Schools, as a microcosm of society, should reflect these dynamics.
Essential Question
How can student voice be honoured in the curricula of government-mandated elementary public education systems?
Response
Through investigation of literature on curriculum development, implementation, and structure, it becomes clear that student voice must be considered a non-negotiable component of public education. Allowing students to actively participate in their learning ensures that curricula are not only delivered to them but shaped with them.
How to Honour Student Voice
Our current model of public elementary education is flawed. It is largely influenced by elected officials who rely on public votes to maintain their positions, yet often lack deep understanding of best practices in education. Decisions are frequently driven by political agendas rather than student learning needs.
The result is a rigid curriculum designed to demonstrate accountability, often measured through standardized testing. Research shows this approach is harmful: **Fu, Hopper, and Sanford** analyzed 183 studies highlighting the detrimental effects of standardized testing on students.
Recognizing these systemic flaws illuminates the *how*: students must be active participants in their own learning. But how do educators do this in practice?
Guidance from Educational Literature
Henry Giroux encourages educators to resist bureaucratic and political pressures, advocating for integrity in practice. He urges teachers to “go for broke,” standing up for student-centered learning despite systemic obstacles.
Goodlad emphasizes the importance of the learning environment. Students should have a voice in shaping the spaces where they learn, contributing to both the social and physical classroom environment.
By integrating these principles, schools can begin to honour student voice meaningfully. When students participate in decisions about how they learn, what they learn, and how their classrooms function, education becomes a shared process, not a top-down mandate.
Honouring student voice is not a “nice to have.” It is essential to the purpose of education itself. Schools exist to prepare children for society, and the ability to communicate, negotiate, and participate in decision-making is central to that preparation. By embedding student voice into curricula, classroom environments, and school culture, educators cultivate responsible, engaged, and empowered learners who are ready to contribute to society in meaningful ways.
References
Dewey, J. *Pedagogic Creed*
Bobbitt, J. Theory of Curriculum
Freire, P. *Pedagogy of the Oppressed*
Giroux, H. *Theory and Resistance in Education*
Goodlad, J. *A Place Called School*
Fu, Hopper & Sanford, Meta-Analysis on Standardized Testing
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